Jihad Universe 1.0 stories
Jihad Universe 2.0 stories
Barney: The Babysitter by
Untitled essay by Jamal Qureshi.
Untitled essay by Shahrazad.
DragonFyr's Pronunciation on the State of the World and Happy Stuff (In Swahili with English subtitles), by Dan Jones
Barney vs. Individualism, by Terrell Henry.
Education, Commercialism and Barney, by Terrell Henry.
Barnee and the Antagonist, by Jeff Verzak.
"Barney & Friends" vs. "Sesame Street," A Comparison, by Aimee Yermish.
Untitled Essay by Amanda Van Rhyn.
The following works of creative fiction are in no way meant to represent nor misrepresent the Lyons Partnership, L.P., or their property Barney® the Purple Dinosaur or any other intellectual properties of the aforementioned Partnership, implicitly or explicitly. The fictional, demonic entity referred to as "B'harnii", "B'harne" and other nomenclature, only loosely based on the Barney® property, is not meant to represent nor tarnish the reputation of the Barney® property. Any potential use of the Barney® name falls within "fair use" as provided by 17 USC 1 § 107.
Warning: This section may contain descriptions of violence. Reader discretion is advised. As always, the Jihad does not condone Real Life violence against the Barney® characters, or any other living being.
Before the creation of Jihad Universe 2.0, there were already plenty of stories about the Jihad and it's exploits across the world. Most of these contradicted, some of them were just out and out strange, but all of them were pretty damn entertaining.
Sadly, only a small handful of the megabytes of words produced between 1991 and 1995 still exist. The Archives now presents these remnants as an example of the Jihad Universe 1.0's work.
(Note: If anybody reading this has Jihad writing from between 1991 and 1995/96 that they would like to share, please email the Archivist at firstname.lastname@example.org. Thank you.)
ADDITIONAL: The Archivist would like to extend many thanks to Tracy J, the Finder of Lost Postings, for locating and sending us a glut of long-lost stuff.
ADDITIONAL ADDITIONAL: The JU1 setting is, right
now and for the forseeable future, closed to new submissions. We regret any
inconvienence this may cause, but we feel that the setting is mainly historical
in nature and should not be added to. -- The Archivist, 07/16/2004
The Fox Files (part 1), by J. FoxGlov
The story of how a lowly student became an anthropomorphic fox -- and one of the great leaders of the Jihad. (Note: The rest of this story is missing, and if anybody has a copy lying about, please email the Archivist. Thank you.)
StryfeFall, by J-Rock
The first of three stories dealing with the Jihad's fight against ancient net.troll Stryfe, or as he liked to call himself, "STRRRRRRYYYYYYYFFFFFFEEEEE!!!" An entertaining read, if nothing else.
StryfeQuest, by J-Rock
The second of the STRRRRRRYYYYYYYFFFFFFEEEEE!!! series takes a team of TRES Corp commandoes on board the seaQuest DSV (Yes, *that* seaQuest) to take out Stryfe's base of operations.
Stryfe'sEnd, by J-Rock
The finale of the exciting STRRRRRRYYYYYYYFFFFFFEEEEE!!! series. Anime in-jokes abound as Admiral J-Rock duels the demon-clone troll Stryfe to the death at the bottom of the Caribbean!
Jihad to the Stars, by Solar Warrior and J-Rock
When unusual events hint at the possible origins of B'harne, TRES Corps and the Solar Ishtari prepare to journey offplanet to find the true nature of their enemy.
Redemption, by Solar Warrior
Just what it sounds like, a story about the redemption of a troubled soul. Starring... well, I think I'll let you find out for yourself.
The Sleepers Strike, by Solar Warrior
At a Jihaddi victory celebration in Michigan, an enemy sleeper agent strikes out, and only the Solar Ishtari can save the day!
Washington Capers, by Solar Warrior
The state of Washington has yet to choose a side in the great war. The Jihad and B'harne are here to make them an offer. To paraphrase Charlie McCarthy, "You won't *believe* how they choose, folks!"
A Dip At La Brea, by Arsenal the Lone Warrior
In one of the few surviving stories from before 1995, classic Jihaddi Arsenal the Lone Warrior fights to keep the La Brea Tar Pits from being stolen. I don't make this stuff up, folks.
Return to La Brea, by Arsenal the Lone Warrior
In the sequel to "A Dip At La Brea," we find out exactly *why* the Enemy was stealing all that tar from California. Featuring a cameo appearance by one of rec.arts.comics.creative's longer-running characters.
Fall of the Power Rangers, by Arsenal the Lone Warrior
Truly one of the great offbeat classics of JU1 literature, this story chronicles one man's fight against the scourge of mid-90's mass-marketing, the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.
Shadow Ranger: Return to Angel Grove, by Arsenal the Lone Warrior
Apparently part of a never-completed series, Shadow Ranger recounts the story of the renegade Ranger from "Fall of the Power Rangers," now lost in a world that's almost exactly, but not *quite* like the one she left.
Soft Touch: Assault on Isla Nublar, by Arsenal the Lone Warrior
Part of a (imperfectly-archived) series, this one has the Lone Jihaddi raiding an ally's base for a maysterious reason. A complete copy of this story may be sent to the Archivist.
The Rescue of Julie, by Solar Warrior
A story from the heady days when Julie the Madhi still walked ab4d. This is a story about her capture by the forces of Evil.
Attack on Barneyville, by The Dentist
A grim-n-gritty Marine raid on an isolated jungle outpost of It Of The One Tooth. This is also the oldest original story currently in the Archives (1993!).
Out of the Pit of Hell, by Zeke
Another 1993 story, this one detailing the escape of a Jihaddi double-agent.
The Barney Hunters, by Jesse Taylor, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
A story from 1994 detailing a gritty post-apocalyptic future where Barney reigns surpeme, etc. etc.